Why Friendship Between A Boy and A Girl is Awesome ?

 All the friendships are special. Whether it is a friendship between two men or two girls or a friendship between a boy and a girl, they all are amazing. But when it comes to a friendship between boy and girl, nothing is more fulfilling.  

 Imagine a life without friends. It can become lonely, boring and purposeless. So we all should have friends and best friends with whom we can share our life, fear, concerns and moments. And when that best friend is from the opposite gender, nothing can be more fulfilling. So, a friendship between boy and girl is something that can bring the best in the friend's life. If you are someone who has a best friend from the opposite gender, you are lucky and should cherish it. 

 So now let us figure out why a friendship between a boy and girl is special and fulfilling?

 1 - It helps you understand the other gender

When you have a best friend from the opposite gender, it helps you understand the behaviour, nature, perspective and personality of the other gender. And it really helps as you grow up and help you understand the other gender very well. 

2 -  It helps you become comfortable with the other gender

When a girl and a guy are best friends, they explore each other and become aware of the opposite gender. It helps you get comfortable with the opposite gender. As you grow up, your friendship with the opposite gender helps you advance in your life and profession.

3 - It helps you drop the awkwardness as you grow up

As you grow up with your best friend who is of the opposite gender, you learn intimate details about each other's life without any judgement. You learn the truth about the opposite gender, learn their dark secrets, and build a strong friendship. 

 4 -  It makes you sensitive towards the other gender

When your best friend is from the opposite gender, it helps you become more sensitive towards the opposite gender, their challenges, needs and finer nuances. The girl learns to speak up without inhibitions to her male best friend, and the boy learns to speak up without inhibitions to her girl best friend. And in the process, both become sensitive towards the opposite genders. 

5 -  It helps both the friends believe in equality of each gender

When your best friend is from the opposite gender, it can teach you that the other gender is important and equal in all aspects of life. While society is biased towards men and treats women subpar to men, you will learn to break these biases. And as a man, you will support the dreams, ambitions and choices of your woman best friend. 

6 -  You learn the skills the opposite gender is strong at

Genetically men are good at a few things like navigational skills or numbers. Women have higher emotional intelligence, patience and other skills. So when a boy and girl are best friends, it makes them learn the skills that both the genders are strong at and that both the gender bring to the table. 

 Also, many people ask: can a boy and girl be best friends? Yes, they can be best friends. Genders do not define friendships, humanity does! So boy and girl can be best friends, and such a relationship can be the strongest one. 

 

Suggested Reading: If you want to read more about this topic, read it here: 5 Reasons Why a Friendship Between Boy and Girl is Special! 

Nine ways how to be true to yourself ?

 We all struggle in our daily lives as we get pulled in various directions simultaneously. Some people pull us towards their needs and expectations, others pull us in a different direction. And in the process, we are surrounded by a lot of distractions that pull us away from our real goal or direction. When these distractions surround us daily, we may end up struggling with staying true to ourselves. 

 So how to stay true to yourself? As you become aware of these distractions, inner feelings, emotions, and surroundings, you pave a way to be true to yourself and achieve ultimate happiness. When you get self-aware, you know what you want and what you do not. It allows you to be honest with yourself. While your peers and society have their own demands and may pull you to do what others want you to do, self-awareness will give you another perspective- to do what you really want to do. So, being true to yourself means that you choose to live a life for yourself first and not for others. 

 Why it's important to be true to yourself?

There are various reasons for being true to yourself, such as happiness and peace. When you are in touch with your innermost feelings, you understand your inner thoughts, needs and wants. And to seek these things, you learn to let go of the past, learn to say no and seek honesty in your life. These things, in return, lend you back your happiness and peace. 

 So it is okay to travel alone, eat junk, get drunk sometimes, get up late, listen to music and just be yourself, rather than scaring yourself with notions about how others will think of you. Do not think about what others have to say, and think about yourself as an independent thinker. You are not a minion to anyone but to yourself only. 

 9 simple ways to be true to yourself

 Here are nine simple ways to be true to yourself:

 1 - Be honest with yourself

Who knows and understands you better than yourself? And who will take care of you better than you yourself? If you do not know your real self, you should start exploring and searching about who you are and what is it that you want from life. Once you figure out your true self, you should hold on to that person, stay real and honest with yourself. People will try to sway you away, but only you can overcome those distractions by staying true and honest. 

 2 -   Be self-aware

Become self-aware by recognising your feelings and the express yourself accordingly honestly and freely. 

 3 -    Learn to say no

To be true to yourself, you need to learn to say no to others. To best serve your best interest, learning to say no can be a valuable life lesson. It doesn't mean you do not have to say yes to others. It means you should know when to say yes and when to say no and stand up for what you want from your life. 

 4 -  Do not waste time pleasing others

If you are in a habit of seeking too many approvals from others to validate your life, stop doing that. In fact, you should please only one person, that is you! Although, it is an instinct to please others. But it is in the best interest to please others. And it is one way of being true to yourself. 

 5 -  Make like-minded friends 

When you find your tribe, and share your feelings with them, motivate them, and stay focussed, you are in a way staying true to yourself. 

 6 -   Do things that are in your best interest

Many times, people come under peer pressure and commit to acts they do not want to. But it is not good when it becomes the order of the day. Instead, you should shed off any peer pressure. You should do things that you are interested in and things that are in your best interest. 

 7 -    Trust your gut feeling and your intuition

Sometimes, it is good to trust your gut feeling and be guided by your intuition. It helps keep you honest and true to yourself. Know one else knows you better than you and trusting your intuition is the way to go forward. 

 8 -    Let go of past, resentment and things that add no value in your life

When you learn to forgive people, let go of the past, move on in life, overcome your grudge and resentment, and things that add no value in your life, you are going in the right direction. These all are the signs that you are being true to yourself. 

 9 -  Learn the lessons and accept the mistakes

When you accept yourself fully, accept your mistakes, learn from them and then move on, it is a sign that you are being true to yourself. 

 Here is a detailed article on how to stay true to yourself that you can refer to for further reading: How to stay true to yourself? 8 signs you are being true to yourself! 

When to let go of a relationship? 4 signs it is time to let go!

 

Relinquishing somebody is truly excruciating. We contribute a ton of time, cash, energy and feelings in a relationship and the more contributed we are, the harder it is to give up. The reasons can be manyfold. Giving up implies dread of the obscure, apprehension about being distant from everyone else, culpability, vulnerability, or absence of certainty, to give some examples. Be that as it may, the outcome is something similar. So when to relinquish a relationship? How about we sort it out.

 

There is the point at which we really want to relinquish a relationship. Yet, we know that the time has come to continue on and how to continue on. Possibly we first need to sort out it from the get go. In any case, now and again, figuring out the distinctions doesn't would equity to your joy and tranquility of care. The sensation of cacophony, contrasts and conflicting conduct outperform your conduct to stick on. So how to cut the lines and know when to let go of a relationship?

 

When to relinquish a relationship? 6 Signs it is an ideal opportunity to continue on

 

Choosing to relinquish somebody your adoration and cutting binds with extraordinary somebody, is quite possibly the most difficult choice. It is difficult and depleting. It blinds you and makes you severe. However, eventually, it assists you with recapturing the right point of view throughout everyday life and discover a genuine sense of harmony for yourself.

 

Circumstances might contrast for various individuals. On the off chance that somebody is hitched and has youngsters, it is truly difficult to continue on as the stakes are extremely high. However, there are a few widespread signs in each relationship that hint that it is an ideal opportunity to continue on. Also here are a couple of signs:

 

1 - Emotional and actual maltreatment

Regardless of whether it is your companion, family, mate or accomplice, assuming somebody is transporting your either verbally and actually or inwardly, or gaslighting you or playing mental games, it is an obvious sign that the time has come to continue on. So let not your companion or anybody mess with your enthusiastic and mental prosperity, hurt your confidence or make light of you. You really want to stand firm for you and remove the poisonousness from your life. Relinquish the harmful individual from your life by knowing signs of toxic people. However long you are in this harmful relationship, you will be mishandled and the victimizer will exploit you.

 

2 -  Infidelity, contemptibility, and duplicity

There are sure major issues in a relationship. As far as I might be concerned, the major issues are disloyalty, cheating, lying, and unscrupulous conduct. Relationships can endure such oddball frequencies yet on the off chance that it is steady conduct, it involves grave concern. It is on the grounds that it shows the individual's personality and uprightness that can never show signs of change.

 

3 -  Contrasting key qualities

At the point when two individuals come from various societies, foundations and families, their basic beliefs contrast. Furthermore in such a situation, a tranquil and strong relationship isn't ensured. Profoundly and principal esteems, love connections are hard to outperform such an obstacle. It is valid in close connections, where two individuals sway each other's life.

 

4 - One-sided relationship

Pose yourself one inquiry, on the off chance that you are the just one placing in and putting resources into this relationship. Furthermore your accomplice never attempts to compensate for itself and never puts resources into the relationship? So you have to determine if your relationship has become toxic? If yes, it is time to know how to deal with toxic people.

What are Throuple Relationships, and How do they Work?

 

They say that three is a magic number, and it is exactly what throuple is- a relationship between three people. And three is not a crowd. Not anymore. So what are throuple relationships?

 A throuple relationship is a relationship between three people in love with each other, and they collectively form a three-way couple. A couple has two people in a relationship, whereas, in a throuple, there are three. While throuples are on the rise in this modern world, they demand maturity and balance to maintain such a relationship. It may look simple on the surface and seem simple to understand, there is a lot more to it. 

 Throuple relationships can be a three-person physical or three-person romantic relationship, both open and closed. 

So what is a throuple?

Throuple is defined as three people in a committed relationship with one another. In general, two people start as a couple and then invite the third person to form a throuple. It means the two people who started as a couple will be more closer, while the third will be present in the relationship. Or it could be that both all the three people are almost equally bonded. A throuple is a specialised form of polyamory. Polyamory is a term used to describe a relationship that is non-monogamous and involves more than two people. 

So how to form a throuple?

There is no single rule or way to form a throuple because it is their own independent and personal choice. Everyone has their own arrangements and ways of making things work. So there is no universal rule that applies to all the throuples. Some throuples are closed throuples and are exclusive to one another. While others are open throuples. In open throuples, the throuple serves as a primary relationship, but members can sleep outside. 

Sometimes two gay men in a relationship involve a third man to form a throuple. And it is called a gay throuple relationship. Many gay couples are in an open relationship, and they invite a third partner for physical pleasure, which later turns out as a throuple. While many gay couples are in a closed relationship and may invite the third partner to form a close gay throuple relationship. 

In the case of a man and a woman who are a couple, sometimes a man is bisexual or the woman is bisexual. When the male is bisexual, the couple may invite another man to be a part of the throuple and stay as a permanent third partner. When the female in the relationship is bisexual, the couple may invite another female to become a member of the throuple. In many cases, the man in the relationship is not sure if he is gay or bisexual or bi-curious. And he may wonder 'Am I, Gay?' or 'Am I Bisexual?' And when he becomes aware that he is bisexual by taking this Am I Gay Quiz, he may invite another man to form a throuple. 

How does a throuple work?

There are no universal principles to make throuple work. Here is a great article on how the throuple relationship works and successful throuple stories

The first and foremost thing that can make or break any relationship is effective communication. And it is applicable for throuples as well. A throuple that communicates, irons out the differences, speaks of fears and jealousy, successfully navigates all the odds. Agreement, moderation, and acceptance go a long way to navigate a throuple relationship. 

Apart from it, all the three partners have to set some ground rules and clearly communicate what is acceptable and what is not. For example, partners in a throuple may agree to sleep outside with a third person, and never tell about it. But they can't romantically be involved outside. Their loyalties will always remain towards their primary relationship of the main throuple. Other throuples work on strict policies like no sleeping outside. In such a case, all the partners are romantically and physcially involved only with one another. 

 All the three partners also have to make time for one another as a throuple and as a couple to bond individually. Regardless, whatever you do as a throuple, the most important thing is your happiness. Any relationship will only work if it brings happiness and joy. It can be throuple or a couple. So, be happy, and enter into a throuple if it works for you and your partners and your third partner. Share your joy and happiness with everyone around you. 

When to let go of a relationship? 6 signs it is time to let go!

 

Letting go of someone is really painful. We invest a lot of time, money, energy and emotions in a relationship and the more invested we are, the harder it is to let go. The reasons can be manyfold. Letting go means fear of the unknown, fear of being alone, guilt, uncertainty, or lack of confidence, to name a few. But the result is the same. Living a life that seems unfulfilled, and unhappy. So when to let go of a relationship? Let's figure it out.

 There is a time when we need to let go of a relationship. But we are aware that it is time to move on and how to move on. Maybe we first want to work it out at first. But sometimes, ironing out the differences doesn't do justice to your happiness and peace of mind. The feeling of dissonance, differences and inconsistent behaviour surpass your behaviour to cling on. So how to cut the cords and know when to let go of a relationship?

 When to let go of a relationship? 6 Signs it is the time to move on

 Deciding to let go of someone your love and cutting ties with special someone, is one of the most challenging decisions. It is painful and draining. It blinds you and makes you bitter. But in the end, it helps you regain the right perspective in life and find peace for yourself. 

 Situations may differ for different people. If someone is married and has children, it is really tough to move on as the stakes are really high. But there are some universal signs in every relationship that hint that it is the time to move on. And here are a few signs:

 1 - Emotional and physical abuse

Whether it is your friend, family, spouse or partner, if someone is busing your either verbally and physically or emotionally, or gaslighting you or playing psychological games, it is a clear indication that it is time to move on. 

 So let not your spouse or anyone play around with your emotional and mental wellbeing, hurt your self-esteem or play you down. You need to take a stand for yourself and cut off the toxicity from your life. Let go of the toxic person from your life by knowing these signs of toxic people.

As long as you are in this abusive relationship, you will be abused and the abuser will take advantage of you. 

2 -     Infidelity, dishonesty, and deceit

There are certain deal-breakers in a relationship. For me, the deal-breakers are infidelity, cheating, lying, and dishonest behaviour. Marriages can survive such one-off incidences but if it is consistent behaviour, then it is a matter of grave concern. It is because it shows the person's character and integrity that can never change. 

 3 -      Contrasting fundamental values

When two people come from different cultures, backgrounds and families, their core values differ. And in such a scenario, a peaceful and supportive relationship is not guaranteed. 

 While some less close relationships like basic friendships can survive divergent core and fundamental values, love relationships are difficult to surpass such a hurdle. It is true in romantic relationships, where two people impact each other's life. 

 4 -      Toxic relationship

If your relationship is defined by consistent toxicity and daily clash, then you two are like oil and water. When your partner brings out the worst in you, and it is your daily life, it is a matter of concern. 

 So you have to determine if your relationship has become toxic? If yes, it is time to know how to deal with toxic people. So to regain your peace, your should let such people go. 

5 -      One-sided relationship

Ask yourself one question, if you are the only one putting in and investing in this relationship. And your partner never tries to make up for it and never invests in the relationship? Do you often find yourself cribbing always and your partner never reciprocate? These are the signs that your spouse or partner is selfish and self-centred. And you are tagging along with this relationship single-handedly. These are the signs that it is time to move on and find an equal partner.

 6 -      Consistent irresponsible behaviour

If you are in a relationship with someone who is always irresponsible, it will compromise your love for that person sooner or later. This consistent irresponsibility when comes to finance, children and other life matters can be seriously detrimental to your life. 

 

No matter how much you care for your partner, such inconsistent behaviour will ultimately put you off. And it will ultimately rip off your relationship.  

How to reparent and heal your inner child?

 

you have heard of the work inner child before? But what is your inner child? Your inner child is the younger version of yourself, a.k.a your former self. Your inner child still resides within you. And now you have grown, but you have not outgrown your past. But you are growing around your past self. Therefore, your part-self still resides within you. 

 

And it means that the dreams of your past self, its needs, fears and trauma are still alive within you. If your needs and wants were neglected as a child, the wounded inner child is still residing within you. It means that you are still hurting from that neglect too. 

 

So the key to healing your inner child and reparenting your inner child lies in becoming aware of your wounded former self, learning about its fears, neglects and needs and then healing those past wounds. When you act both as the child and parent of the child, it is called reparenting your inner child. 

 

What does it mean to heal your inner child or reparent your inner child?

Reparenting your inner child means reparenting your former self to heal the past wounds that are still fresh and still exists within you. When your inner child feels safe, loved and listened to, it starts healing, and you also heal in the process. 

 

There are a few signs of a wounded inner child that indicate you need to reparent and heal your inner child to be effective in the present. Once you recognize these signs, you can work upon yourself. And now you are an adult you can consciously work upon healing your former self. So you are the child who is hurting, and you are the parent healing your hurt inner child. It is called inner child work and this is the way inner child work can help you reshape your future and make you happier. 

 

How can you heal your inner child and take care of it?

So how you can go about inner child work? It is a long process of taking conscious care of yourself. You intentionally work to know yourself, examine your inner child, console it, listen to it, and give it time. It also involves a deep examination of your situation and reflecting on your conflicts. 

 

1. Talk therapy: One of the ways to reparent and heal your inner child is to talk to a therapist or a healer or a professional counsellor. 
2. Journaling: You can try maintaining a journal of your thoughts, emotions and feelings from the perspective of your inner child. You can write about the traumatic incidences, try to understand where your trauma comes from, and recreate your life situation. 
3. Sharing it with friends: Ask your family or friends whom you confide in about if they have reparented their wounded inner child and have common experiences to share. 
4. Be playful: Yes, you are an adult and mature now and hold yourself from laughing and being playful. But if as a child your desires were neglected, giving your child the same experiences does wonder to heal your inner child.   
5. Keep a log of your feelings: Keep a log of the situations and when your inner child shows up. Make a quick note of such a situation. Also, note down what needs or desires they are expressing to you.
6. Make a promise: When you encounter your inner child, make a promise to your wounded inner child that you will not let them be hurt again, will protect them and to forgive others and move on. It will help your inner child to heal and become peaceful. 

 

By adopting these things you will see your inner child healing and you will also see yourself move beyond your past pain. 

How to stop comparing yourself to others and be successful

 

In today's world, where everyone is on social media, it is almost impossible to not be updated on what everyone else in your social circle is doing. Some people are partying on a yacht while others are busy pigging out in the most expensive restaurants. I know most of you are happy for others and their happening life, but deep down in your subconscious, a sense of comparison is contaminating your thoughts. And deep down, you know that it is not a healthy habit to compare yourself to others as it takes away your peace and happiness. So how to stop comparing yourself to others? 

 

What are examples of comparing yourself to others

 

If you want to learn how to stop comparing yourself to others, you should understand how comparisons occur. 

 

1. You believe that all other people are lucky. And it means we believe that we are born unlucky. And whenever you witness any injustice and others didn't suffer the same, you believe that they are luckier than you. But it is not true. Everyone has their own fate and life to deal with. You never know the others think that you are luckier than them. Once you realise how blessed you are, you will break this comparison trap. 
2. You believe that all other people are more successful. But you forget that these people may outwardly be more successful and that success is a state of mind. For some success means wealth, and for others it means happiness. Yes, some people are prodigy and are best in what they do, and you are not one of them. Accept it and move on.

 

So now let us check out how to stop comparing yourself to others?

 

1. Embrace your imperfection

In this age of social media, it is impossible to escape making comparisons. And everyone wants to show their perfect self on social media. But understand that social media is not real life. Acknowledge that no one is perfect, and we are not too. No matter how polished your friends appear on their social media feed, the truth is that no account is an actual reflection of their actual success. Once you realize this, you will stop comparing yourself to others. 

 

2.     Find your internal strength

You should stop asking how to stop comparing yourself to others and find your own internal strength. Stop looking outside for inspiration and guidance from others on social media and instead, look inside. Once you start looking inside, you will find your internal strength and self-esteem. 

So the idea is to find your own strengths, work upon them, and perfect them. It will help you break the habit of making comparisons. And it will make you more effective in your present. 

 

So do not be emotionally weak by submitting to comparison pressure. Instead, turn around the table and turn your weak mindset into a stronger one. 

 

3.     Find meaning in your life

Another way to break this habit of comparing yourself to others is to find some meaning in your life that is larger than your financial or professional success. For example, you can start working for the cause of humanity, like working for the environment. It will give you eternal peace and will lend you the necessary purpose in life to look forward to. Once you do it, you will not find time for social comparisons. Even if you scroll through your social media feed, you will be happy for people as you have a different life purpose to care for. 

 

You should embrace positive ways to find and build significance in your life. When you give back to life, in form of volunteering or charity, life will give you back contentment and peace. 

 

4.     Be really happy for people

The other way to stop comparing yourself to others is to be really happy for people. Once you start being happy for people, they will reciprocate the same and positivity will enter your life. It will also lend you confidence as you can be happy for people without being threatened by their success. Once you celebrate people and their accomplishments, you eliminate the need to compare yourself with others. 

 

5.     Br grateful for what you have

If you really want to stop comparing yourself to others, you should be grateful for whatever you have in your life. Common, some people do not even have access to clean water to drink, and you are cribbing over someone buying a Lamborghini. You look at your life and count your blessings. I am sure you would find so many that you would fall short on numbers. 

 

In the end, if you spend quality time with yourself and your family, you will break this habit of comparing yourself to others. It is because you will find your own nirvana and happiness.