5 Unmistakable Signs You're in a Relationship With a Narcissist

 

What is it that comes to your mind when you think of narcissism? For me, two things top the list: malevolent self-centeredness and self-obsession. Yes, narcissistic people have these two dominant traits in their personalities. They lack empathy and can be very insensitive to the people around them, as the only thing they love the most is talking about themselves. So, what are the signs that you're in a relationship with a narcissist or dating one?

Narcissistic people have inflated egos, unrealistic fantasies, a sense of entitlement, a grandiose persona, and other traits that they use to seek approval and boost their self-esteem. 

On paper, these narcissistic people have it all to be good partners, such as good looks, attractive personalities, success, and money. These are the parameters that you seek out in your long-term partners. But things can gradually put you on the other side of the story when dating a narcissist. 

Your narcissistic partner may start by "love bombing" and making you feel very special with texts, compliments, and heart-winning generosity, but only for personal gains. Then they try to regulate you by manipulating this attention and adoration. And with time, the true colors of your narcissistic partner start to become visible. You may be shocked to find that your prince charming has become a narcissistic beast. And then the relationships start to deteriorate! 

You may wonder if narcissists can be good partners. But unfortunately, the clear answer is "no." You will get hurt when you are dating a narcissist or in a relationship with a narcissist, and you will get hurt on a daily basis.

Narcissism is a trait that is very difficult to change. Psychologists believe that once you are a narcissist, you are always a narcissist. Narcissistic people feel no remorse when they sabotage their relationships. You can expect them to leave you at any time, but vice-versa doesn't go well with them, and they can make things really ugly if you walk out of a relationship with them. They are challenging people to be around! 

What if you are already in a relationship with a narcissist? How do you know the signs you're dating a narcissist or signs you are in a relationship with a narcissist?

5 Signs you're in a relationship with a narcissist

These are the top signs you're in a relationship with a narcissist, and they can help you figure out your partner's hidden personality and spot the red flags. And once you confirm that your partner is a narcissist, you should walk out of such a relationship. Yes, narcissism is one of the many signs indicating your relationship is over. 

1. They just love to talk about themselves

When two people enter into a relationship, they get to know each other by sharing their life stories. You tell them about yourself and then listen to them. It's like a two-way street. But narcissists love to just talk about themselves, be the center of attention, and want all the focus on themselves only. There is no other way they want it to be. 

Narcissists also ignore the people around them or their partners, what they want to share, and how they feel, and may even cut you in the middle and direct the conversation towards themselves. 

In short, they don't care what you have to say or how you feel. All they care about is bragging about themselves! 

2. They lack empathy

One of the key traits of narcissistic people is that they lack empathy. They do not have any genuine affection for their partners. They are least bothered about their partner's feelings and desires. All they see is their attention, and it can be very challenging to coach them to listen to others and be sensitive to their needs. 

Narcissists lack genuine affection and may even sabotage your relationship with them if you don't fall in line with their expectations. 

3. They gaslight you

One thing common among all narcissists is that they all engage in gaslighting. They use gaslighting to trick their partners into believing that they are wrong. They may deny you the truth by backtracking and denying that they ever said such a thing. And a sane person like you will start to question their sanity. As a result, you may feel insecure and apologize for something you have not done. 

Narcissists use gaslighting to make you think you're wrong so they can feel better about themselves and show they're in charge of the relationship.

4. They have a superiority complex

Narcissists have inflated egos. They think they are grandiose and super entitled. So, they believe they should get more attention and privileges than anyone else, even their partners. Consequently, they may not even think twice before undermining others, including their partners, to lift themselves up and feel better. They are unconcerned about your feelings. 

So, a tell-tale signal that your partner or the person you are dating is a narcissist is when they start to feel, behave, and speak as though they are superior to you. 

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Read Also: 5 signs it's time to let go of a relationship!

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5. They are superficial

Narcissists are shallow people and are very superficial in nature. It means they make friends based on how good they look or how rich they are so that they can make them look better. And once you serve their purpose or challenge them, they will shift their loyalties and dump you right there. And therefore, narcissists don't have long-term relationships as they cannot retain people for long. 

They are always concerned about their reputation, and if you tarnish it in any way, they will say goodbye. If you are dating a partner and you start to fight publicly, they will simply ignore you and your needs and be more concerned about their reputation. 

Narcissists are incredibly superficial people without much gravity to their character, and therefore, they may not be very loyal to you either. 

So, if you're dating a narcissist, watch out for these signs. Once you spot these signs, it would be better to exit such a relationship as soon as possible, as nothing will change. You may waste a couple of more years pleasing your narcissistic partner, but to no avail! 

If you choose to stay back for reasons you can't explain, you should be mindful that you are dating a narcissist and manage your expectations. Or else you get hurt on a daily basis. These people rarely change! So, if you're still in such a relationship, seek comfort from people who love you rather than from your narcissistic partner.