How To Reach When Your Friend Comes Out To You

 Coming out as a member of the queer community can be quite a challenge for your friend, but it can equally be taxing on you as well. Coming out can be a life event for your LGBTQ friend as they would have waited for a long to come out to you and confide in you. And you have become a glorious recipient of this coming out confession. It is normal for you to undergo a shock when your friend comes out to you, as it can surprise you, and you will take a while to let this feeling sink in. 

 

You can simply say go and deal with it, or I don't know what to say, but it is the last thing you want to say when your friend comes out to you. But this approach can upset your friend, and it will be an insensitive thing to do when someone comes out to you. 

 

So what to say when someone comes out to you?

 

There are a few things that you should say when your friend opens up and confesses in front of you about their orientation. And you should choose your words carefully, as this can be a life event or a significant moment in your friend's life, and it would have taken a lot of courage and guts to come out finally. 

 

Don't say you always knew about them; it will be like passing judgment on them. And it is not about you. It is about them! So when you say you had a hint or doubt, you are making it about yourself. Instead, it would help if you thanked them for coming out to you. 

 

Or you can say: I am glad you came out to me and confided in me. It will give your friend confidence in you and reassure them of your friendship. They will also feel confident about their decision and will be glad to have you in their life. They will also feel good to know your reaction as it will make them feel good about the right decision they made to come out to you. 

 

You can reassure them and tell them things will be alright and that you still respect them and support them, whatever so ever. Also, you can ask them about their challenges and journey and ask if they need help from you. You can also try to understand their issues and pain points and enlighten yourself on the LGBTQ community. 

 

Always remember not to ask them if your friend fancies you or will hit on you. It will be a very cliche thing to do and can even cost you your friendship. Also, do not tell them that it all does not matter; as for your friend, it is a life event, and his orientation does matter. 

 

Another thing to do is to ask them about their partner or friends and make time for them. You can tell them that you are willing to talk more about the issue if your friend is willing to do so. If they are not, you can simply ask them to take their sweet time to open up. 

 

Okay, but sometimes the situation can be more challenging. Your friend might come out to you over text. So, how to react in such a situation? What to say when someone comes out over text?   

 

In such a case, when someone like your friend comes out over the text or on call, you should take some time to respond. But when you receive such a text, tell them it's okay and tell them you will get back to them as you are busy. You might need time to process this feeling and comprehend how to respond as you are shocked. But then, after some time, you should call them or text them to meet and discuss face to face. It will not disappoint your friend; you can also buy time to let this feeling sink in. 

 

So, these are a few things you should do when your friend comes out to over text or otherwise. Be with them like you were with them like ever before!