Are you a gay man and married to a woman

 

Are you a gay man and married to a woman? Are you suffering in silence, agony and pain alone? You don't know what to do, and you feel stuck in life? But do not worry, a lot of gay men go through this and you are not alone in this. 

 

Many times gay men enter into straight marriages because they do not have any other option. For example, I know of a friend of mine who married a woman as he couldn't find a committed man for himself. Another friend of mine married a woman because he wanted to have kids, and with men, he can't have his own children. And he was not okay with the idea of surrogacy. I also know of men who entered into mixed-orientation marriages because they couldn't come out and did so under parental pressure. 

 

So if you are a gay man and married to a woman, what your reasons were? You need to find out what was the reason you married a woman, and then you need to think if that reason is still valid. When you understand yourself, ask yourself if this is the way you want to spend your entire life, or if you want to move on and live a life by being true to yourself? 

 

You will get a lot of answers with this simple exercise. Another thing to ask yourself is: are you now proud of yourself for who you are? A lot of queer men are ashamed of their sexuality and hide in the closet for their entire lives. But it makes them aloof and scared. These men suffer alone and are very harsh on them. It is not required. In fact, there is nothing wrong to be homosexual and you should be proud of who you are. When you are proud of yourself, you can take a stand for yourself. And you can live life the way you want. 

 

Another thing to ask if you are a gay man married to a woman is that does your wife know about your sexuality. In all probability, she would be known but she is not vocal or sure about it. Even if you are sure she doesn't know about your sexuality she would have already questioned is my husband gay.

 

Anyways, the problem is not that. The problem is that you are being untruthful to your wife and to yourself foremost. And it is not right. Not for you and not for your wife and family. Things will go worse with time your wife figures it all out later on in life. 

 

One thing to consider here is that are you being honest with your wife? Are you sure you not sleeping around with other men? And if you are sleeping with other men, you are not only breaking her trust but also putting her at risk. Is this justified?

 

So all the gay men who are married to men, please stop doing this. Own up your sexuality, and come out of your closet. I am not asking you to break your marriage but asking you to be honest and upfront about it. Your wife deserves to know. Then you and her can both come together and take a call. If she or you or both of you want to move on, it is okay. It will eventually liberate you and your wife. 

 

So exiting your marriage is best the solution. This way you can be honest with yourself, your family and your wife. Also, it will give your wife to build a life of her own that she deserves. And you can live a life with your boyfriend that you always dreamt of.