There seems to be a lot of mess around putting yourself before others as it is considered something self-centred and selfish. People perceive the act of putting themselves before others as stingy and greedy. Many people shy away from putting themselves first because they think this will make them bad people in the eyes of society, family or friends. And that is what we fear the most: being a selfish or bad person.
The reasons could be many. But if you want your own mental peace, happiness and peace of mind you should learn to say no. Moreover learning to say no will help you prioritize your needs and indulge in self-love for a healthy mind, body and soul! So you need to put yourself first. And to do so you need to understand that if you put yourself first it is not selfish or bad! In fact it is an effort that you are making for your own mental well-being and peace of mind.
Ask yourself if you are stealing or killing someone? Are you causing some harm to others when you say no to others or when you put yourself before others first? Rather I would see it as an attempt to fix your own heart, body and mind. And you should not shy away from putting yourself and your needs first. It is absolutely fine if you put yourself before others and prioritize your needs first. After all, it is your life, and you have all the right to steer it the way you want. Let not the thought of what others will think to cloud your judgement. Let not others decide how you want to prioritize your life and needs. Let not others dictate how to decide to spend your day or your spare time. It is your prerogative to take care of yourself and to put your needs first. It is okay to put yourself first.
One point to be noted here is that people think that the person who puts themselves first is selfish. But it is actually self-less. How? When you put your needs first to attend to your need without seeking the help of others, unlike others, it is an act that is self-less. At least you are not asking others to help you and give you their time. You are seeking your own time for spending with yourself.
Four Reasons you should put yourself first:
- You are responsible for your own happiness:
If you spend your time pleasing others and putting others' needs first, who is going to take care of your needs? Yes, you heard it right that no one is going to save you. It is only you who can save yourself.
- Save yourself before you save others:
As they say, to help others you need to help yourself first. You need to fill your car petrol first before you decide to ferry people in it. It means if you are not at peace and happy how will you give time to others and attend to their needs.
People are responsible for their own happiness and needs
You need to understand that people are responsible for their own needs, and you cannot help them beyond a point. And certainly not the expense of your own time, peace and happiness.
- So now you know that it is not stingy to put yourself first before others, and putting yourself before others is not selfish.
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